Tanorexia – A new name for an old stupidity

Share this Shit

I’ve said it before and I’ll keep saying it. People are fucking stupid.

Just like I don’t get smokers that started smoking after about 1965 when the FDA started putting warning labels on cigarette packs, I don’t get tanners. Really, truly, smokers are a whole class of idiot on to themselves, but tanning bed addicts are nearly as puzzling.

I think we all know that excess exposure to UV radiation can cause skin cancer. I know several non-tanners that have had a tumor removed as young as 25, so I can only imagine how much riskier it is when you lay in a fucking tanning bed.

In reality skin cancer is scarier than people realize. It is the most common form of cancer, about 3.5 million tumors in about 2 million people a year are found. (Yes that means that most skin cancer patients have more than one tumor). Melanoma being the killer skin cancer, about 1 in 55 of us will be diagnosed with it in our lifetime. One person dies from melanoma every hour and it’s the most common form of cancer for young people. In case you doubt the tanning bed / cancer connection, doctors point out that 65% all melanoma and 90% of non-melanoma cases are directly attributable to excess UV exposure.

Yet people still go to places like Tan Co. and Pacific Beach and I have to ask WHAT FUCK IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE?

Oh yeah, I forgot they’re idiots. We cry and whine about the cost of health insurance but we do shit like lay in a box that blasts our skin with radiation so that we can look like this fucking moron. Make me doubt if we should be allowed at the top of the food chain.

Obviously this post was prompted by the recent story about the New Jersey woman who allegedly allowed her 5 year old to get a sunburn in a tanning bed. Normally, the school who reported the suspicion to the police would not have suspected that the kid was allowed to use a tanning bed, except that her mother looks like this.

Yes, she is caucasian.

This woman’s story, Patricia Krentcil, has the media using a newer term in the pseudo-medical lexicon; tanorexia. Tanorexia being a psychological addiction to excessive sun or fake sun tanning to the point that you TURN CHOCOLATE BROWN. Nasty.

Leave it to the media to coin a phrase that makes someone’s idiotic behavior sound like a disease. I’m sorry but most “addictions” are just people being stupid. Actually I’m not sorry. It’s true. And tanorexia is an excellent example.

You can blame fashion and Hollywood and MTV or those old Bain de Soleil San Tropez commercials but in reality fake-o-bake is dumb and looks like shit.

Thankfully, nearly all of the States in this country have passed or are working on legislation to limit the use of tanning beds by minors, or ban them completely for non-medical use (yes there are actually medical conditions that benefit from being UV blasted). So maybe in the next 10 years these fucking marroon morons will start to disappear, but until then I’m sure Mrs. Krentcil will not be the first Oompa Loompa to have her day in court.

With all due respect,

The Chief