Ardi Rizal – Smoking Baby Buddah

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Yes, I’ve been gone for a while and no I’m not sorry. I’ve been distracted lately by the rest of my life and have not felt the urge to express myself on our pages.


Until today, when I saw the video of this little fat indonesian kid smoking a fag like a 50 year old bar fly. Name, Ardi Rizal. Habit, 40 smokes a day. Life expectancy, about 20 years, with the last 5 or so breathing like a 90 year old women with a 2 pack a day habit for 70 years.


Watch this video and you’ll quickly see that Ardi has the technique of a long term smoker, complete with deep inhales and puckered lip exhalations. He even twirls the cancer stick between his fingers and points with his coffin-nail and laughs with what one could describe as a baby smokers voice.



On top of the smoking, he’s also a little fatty. Presumptively because of his smoking, he can’t keep up with other kids in his nasty little village, so he scoots around town on a little plastic toy truck. Perhaps a few less cigs a day are in order.


Now in his defense, it’s obviously his parents who are to blame.  His asshole father takes the credit for getting him started. It makes me wonder how that conversation went. I’m guessing something like, “Hey the fucking baby is screaming again, what does he want?” “I don’t know, give him cigarette maybe it will calm him down.” “Does he know how to smoke?” “Just show him, he’ll figure it out.” And in the mind set of your typical 1950’s smoker, the father says, “He looks pretty healthy to me. I don’t see a problem.”


Ardi’s mother, who could be described as the poster child of mothers without a clue, says that,”He’s totally addicted. If he doesn’t get cigarettes, he gets angry and screams and batters his head against the wall. He tells me he feels dizzy and sick.” 


No shit you ridiculous bitch? Did it not occur to you that he would become addicted like every other person you know that smokes? I guess in Indonesia they don’t put those warning on the packs, or maybe she just can’t read. 


Ardi’s mom probably should be nominated for Biggest Idiot of 2010. 


It just goes to show that it truly is a World Full of Idiots.


With all due respect,


The Chief

  1 comment for “Ardi Rizal – Smoking Baby Buddah

  1. Darth Taco
    May 28, 2010 at 12:43 pm

    Isn't cigarettes one our biggest exports?
    I think we should increase production for all of our overseas friends. Especially China.
    Don't we owe them for all the lead-based paint toys?

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